My Grandparents live on a homestead. Quite literally the home my Grandpa was born in. Every memory they ever made was in that farmhouse and a lot of my memories are there, too. Growing up I always envied friends of mine who had lived in the same house since they were born and their parents never planned on moving. Even still, I didn’t want that for me. I love houses too much to stay in one for too long. But that doesn’t mean I don’t miss the ones we used to have. In fact, that’s one of our favorite Friday night rituals after the baby’s in bed. We try to think of a memory in one of our old homes that the other person won’t remember. Jon always wins because as he often reminds me, he has the memory of an elephant, for whatever that means.

I remember when we were considering moving to Chicago. I had spent summers since I was five living with my Dad in California. I went “away” to college. If you call away a three hour drive. But I had never lived somewhere where I didn’t know a soul. My Dad was our only biggest champion and implored us to seize the opportunity. We did (and I will never be able to thank him enough for the push we needed to leave). My first six months were really hard. Jon adjusted to our new city right away, but for me it was six months and a day. One particularly hard day was in the juice aisle of the grocery store. I literally started crying for no reason other than “this isn’t Wegmans” and I was so inconsolable that we left a half-empty cart (see what I did there?) and headed back to the car.

Whether you move 698 miles like we did, or just 6 to a new neighborhood, a move can take more of a toll on you than you’re expecting. Maybe you won’t have a grocery store meltdown, but you may have some anxiety, or a nagging ache for the routine you were used to. Here are some of the things that really helped me, and I hope they help you feel more at home, too.

• Say hello. We won’t tell you to “make friends” like you’ll find on every other list. All we’re suggesting is to smile and say hello to the cashier, the passerby’s on the street, the mom at the park. Exchanging niceties with the same people you see every day or every week will help you build that familiar feel you’re craving.
• Give back. I started to truly feel at home when I began volunteering regularly at our local soup kitchen. It made me feel like I was making a tangible difference in our community. Not only was I connecting with other people, it made me feel grateful to my new city for the opportunity to be a part of something so meaningful.
• Date Your City. Be a tourist! Check out the museum you’ve heard so much about. Make reservations at that restaurant that’s so hard to get into. Playground hop with your kiddos and plan a picnic in the park. All of these things will quickly build new memories, boost your mood, and get you out and about exploring all of the exciting new adventures in your backyard. (PS – this cheeseball photo you see is of us at the Bean. The most touristy spot in Chicago. But we loved it and I’ll never forget freezing my hosiery off for this Christmas card!)
• Make your house a home. This is the most golden nugget of all. Home is where you feel the most you, the most free, the most comfortable. Whether that be with your significant other, your pets, your stuff. If your home truly becomes your sanctuary, you won’t care whether it’s in Baltimore or Belize (all hands raised for Belize though, amIright?!) The time you take seeking out and adding new pieces to your space (my favorite!), making the changes that only you will appreciate, taking ownership of the projects that need to be done. That’s when it will feel like home. Keep the old rituals that brought you happiness in your last place, but don’t be afraid to add some new ones. Turn the half-empty cart into one that’s brimming over with new (and oh so exciting) opportunities.

Comment below if you have some to add to our list, since you never know when the next #NixonPack move might be!